Tips for Writing Love Letters Include Learning the Types

Cartoon Man Learning

Writing love letters in their many forms will give you a chance to write what’s tucked away in your mind. Imagine the look on someone’s face when they read the love letter you sent them. It could jump-start their day or add meaning to their night. When you take the time to follow these tips for writing love letters, it means you write from a special place within your heart and the recipient of your letter will feel it.

Let’s see what makes the love letter special: 

The art of writing a passionate love letter goes back thousands of years. Many people even find it enjoyable to read love letters that were written decades or centuries ago, whether because they relate to the passionate feelings or because they simply enjoy the poetic phrasing . . . the act of sitting down to hand-write a letter to a person you love can represent an even more romantic gesture in the modern day. (Justice)

People are now used to receiving text messages and emails when they talk to each other. Even when it relates to love in some way. This is okay except it lacks the personal touch that Justice talks about. A pleasant surprise awaits someone about to receive a handwritten love letter. It may become a keepsake to the recipient who can go back and reread it over and again.

Explore more about the art of writing a passionate love letter.

Although the passionate type of love is what most people think about when it comes to love, there are other types from which you can write love letters. Here are the most common:

  • Agape is a selfless love.  We hold this love for humanity. When we give to charities and include a note of caring and sharing, this is a letter of love.
  • Philia represents mutual respect. We show this when we write to friends and peers. Think Philadelphia, which means city of brotherly love.
  • Storge exemplifies the nurturing aspect between parents and children. (In college, my mother sent me a care package with a note. It did not mention the word love, but I understood that it was sent in love. The note simply stated something to the effect of being sure to drink all of the prune juice. I don’t know why Mom would send prune juice. I gave her no indication that I needed a laxative. Besides, I could buy prune juice at a store near the campus where I was in school. But this is the thinking of a mother.)
  • Eros is the romantic type of love that most people think of. It’s passion. It’s a deep emotional connection. It’s the type of love that prompts one to write poetry.
  • Pragma is the love between couples who have been together for a long time. It is based on compromise and understanding. 

Again, writing love letters can apply to any of the above types of love. Here’s more to learn about the benefits of writing love letters.

Tips For Writing Love Letters Include Benefits

Man thinking

We receive cards for holidays, such as Christmas or birthdays. The cards often end with the word love. We cherish these cards, and when we write them for others, we believe they will be well-received.

Our society has evolved into one where more people are working from home. Hence, we see less of other people and therefore, interact even less with them. Sending someone a love letter can be a mutually beneficial event for both the sender and the receiver. Tips for writing love letters show the benefits of doing so. These tips can:

  • Lift sadness and loneliness
  • Help you heal by sharing pent-up feelings
  • Show someone you genuinely care about them
  • Act as your attempt to mend a broken relationship
  • Bring forth joy in anticipation of someone special reading your words
  • Hone your cognitive skills, thereby improving your creative writing skills
  • Act as an emotional outlet to allow you to share your innermost thoughts

As you can see, there is power in sending and receiving love letters.

Tips For Writing Love Letters Include This Example

Couple with a love letter

Image created with Dream by Wombo

If you’re planning to write a love letter, there are things you may want to do first. How about getting yourself in the mood? You can do this by using your senses. 

You might want to go to a place that you love, such as sitting on the rocks at the beach. You might enjoy listening to a jazz piece that sways your mind in a certain way. A glass of wine might help you relax. The smell of a vanilla-scented candle might lift your spirits. Or just stroking a cat’s fur, touching its softness, might start the creative ball rolling.

Before using these tips for writing love letters, you’ll need to hold in the forefront of your mind if you’re actually in a relationship or if you’re trying to get into one. If you’re in a relationship, is it a solid one or is it on the rocks? Is it a special occasion, such as an anniversary or birthday? How do you think the love letter will be received?

Depending on your answer, these will be very different letters. If you plan to write a heartfelt love letter to someone who doesn’t know you, be careful. Pouring out heartfelt sentiments to this individual could creep them out. People are on the lookout for danger. Your letter may be perceived as stalking behavior. If you need to write a letter to someone you admire who might not know you, do not write a love letter, but one with a casual introductory vibe.

Remember, what you write can get passed around by the recipient. And if not done properly, it could be used against you in a humiliating manner. 

Let’s suppose you’re dating, and you want her to know how you feel. You decide to write her a love letter because you believe she will understand it and cherish it. Here are some tips for writing love letters:

Message in a bottle

Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay 

  1. What material will you use? A plain sheet of paper? If so maybe you can add some doodles to make it interesting and fun. But if you’re a plain kinda person, leave it plain. If you’re the goofy kind and she’s goofy, too, or understands goofiness, write on a paper bag. How’s that for creativity?
  2. Use a personal greeting, such as Dear, To, or For. Include her name. If you’re less formal, it could be as simple as Hey or Hey there. “Hey there, Rebecca.” If you’ve given her a nickname, you can use that. “Hey there, Becky Bear.”
  3. Ask yourself why you’re writing the love letter. This could be an anniversary of your dating or your marriage. Or it could simply be because you saw a movie that reminded you of her. Maybe you love her so much, you feel the need to express yourself. 
  4. Write to fit your partner’s personality. Is she serious? Likes to be amused? Likes surprises? Likes to joke around?
  5. Are you a poet? If so could you write a poem? Are you a writer? Are you an artist? You can incorporate some of these elements into your love letter.
  6. You can use a quote to help you express yourself.
  7. Stay on course. Keep it light. Don’t write about anything negative, such as “You might not love me like I love you . . .”
  8. Write something memorably sweet at the end so that you leave her with a good vibe. You can put the quote here if you like.

In penning these tips for writing love letters, I created one that appears below. I imagine it to be from a man to his wife Bettie for no particular occasion. He’s spontaneous, unpredictable, humorous, and imaginative. And he knows his wife understands his personality. 

Here’s the love letter:

Hey there, Bettie-Boop,

Please forgive the stationery. This paper bag is all I have at the moment. And what I want to say to you just can’t wait. As I sit here on the pier people-watching, I see this little girl who has a red helium-filled balloon. It’s a fat balloon, and I thought of you. Calm down! No, I’m not saying you’re fat.

I’m saying I imagine the balloon is not filled with helium, but with love, with the love I have for you. The little girl holds tightly to the balloon because it’s so precious to her. She can’t take her eyes off it. 

Bettie-Boop, that’s how I feel about you. Even after all these years. I will leave this note on the kitchen counter. You’ll find it when you get home. Accompanying this note is a red helium balloon. 

And the little red box next to the red balloon? Well, that’s another story.

I love you like there’s no tomorrow,


Girl with red balloon

Image by  Adrian Eyre from Pixabay

The above example is one of Pragma love; the couple has been together for years. These tips for writing love letters will let someone know your intimate feelings and open a channel for their response. Love letters serve as physical evidence of affection aimed at strengthening relationships. These tips are especially needed during uncertain times.

Unless otherwise stated, Images by Pixabay.

“Thinking of you keeps me awake. Dreaming of you keeps me asleep. Being with you keeps me alive.”

                                                                          – Unknown

Justice, April. “The Love Letter: A Lost Art Form?” Betterhelp, 19 Mar. 2024,